I need by 7:30 pm the person who did it di it wrong and stopped responding

The most difficult client I’ve ever worked with was a mother of 4 children, which she conceived all 4 through rape or unwanted sexual partners. She was diagnosed with depression, and social phobia. When I first met her for her assessment, she would not come out of her room. She was court ordered, and sent for any evaluation. Well I finally convinced  her to come sit at the table with me, so I could complete her assessment packet. She was running from her past, which consisted of  a long history of verbal, physical and sexual abuse. She disclosed to me that her sons had been sexually assaulted by an older male whom they lived with for more than five years. She stated how she walked in on them one night and heard the sounds coming from the room, but she simply closed the door and walked to her room.

My Values:

In that moment I was so taken aback. As the mother of a 14 and 6 year old  daughter, I could not phantom how any mother could do this to their own child. Not once, but for 5 years. This goes against everything I value. A child is suppose to be protected, loved, and care for. Not treated like some animal or like a piece of meat.

The Issues:

My heart was broken. I was beyond conflicted; I was baffled, heartbroken, angry, sad and shocked to the least. In that moment, I could not hear anything else she had to say . However, I knew that I could not scar this woman by forcing my thoughts and my judgment on her. I did not want this lady to turn away from help, because I was placed in a situation that was overwhelming for me

Handling the Situation:
How I handle the situation? I got on the phone, and called my auntie who’s a LPC, and I knew who would display the same type of values and expression as I did. However, she had something I did not have and that was experience and wisdom.  What said was told was Dee that’s what she called me. As a therapist you cannot expect people to have the same understanding, and values as you. If they did they probably would not need help. That by far was the best piece of advice I have ever received. It changed my perspective on what I do , and taking by far  this journey to becoming an LPC.

Issue Facing Beginning Counselors:

The issue facing as I began this journey to becoming a counselors would be me trying not to be so judgmental. I have to realize that everyone values and views aren’t the same as mines. I would have to work on my facial expression, because a lot of time people have told me that when something is being said to me, and I don’t agree I tend to make an unpleasant face. Another issue would be dealing with demanding and aggressive clients. Being were I was raised and brought up my attitude does not handle disrespectful people, so when things like this occurs I’ll have to remember why the client is seeking counseling. I  have a lot of patient, but becoming aggressive and disrespectful is one thing I don’t tolerate to well. I’ve been known to be the most outspoken one, and not sugar coating anything.

Reference:

Halbur, D. A., & Halbur, K. V. (2015). Developing your theoretical orientation in counseling and psychotherapy (3rd Ed..).  Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson.